I met the President!!!

Next up on our list of crazies is LUCY. Lucy is a.. Fifty-something? Dare I say sixty-something? .. year old woman. Lucy is usually quite quiet and reserved. However, she definitely has her moments.
Med time, for example. EVERY time it's time for meds, she throws a fit. "No, I don't need any &^$%$ Meds! Doctor says I'm going home in an hour, don't need 'em anymore."
"Uhm.. Lucy, you're still on observation. You haven't even met with your doctor yet..."
"I know, but he just told me to not take my meds anymore because I'm going home in an hour. Bye guys, sorry."
..Yeah. Lucy wasn't going ANYWHERE. By the end of the fit, she always agrees to take them. "Since I'm leaving anyway.."
haha.

Also, Lucy has QUITE the resume. APPARENTLY, Lucy is:
President of the FBI.
President of the CIA.
Vice-President of the FBI
Vice-President of the CIA (Apparently the original vice-pres. weren't doing their jobs, so Lucy fired them and decided to do it herself. What a woman!)
President of the Food & Drug Administration
THE Las Vegas Comedian.
Elvis Presley's CURRENT seamstress. (That's right. He only died for a minute. The news forgot to cover that he came back alive again. Oops!) (Also, did I mention Hilary Clinton is apparently a clone? The real one died whilst her husband was in office! It's a good thing she didn't become our president... Can't have those darn clone-presidents running everything.. Not AGAIN...)
A Supreme Court Judge.
The MOTHER of a supreme court judge.
The old governor of UTAH.
When she was ONE year old, she was adopted into the US, and had to SUPPORT her family. ..So she went to work! She bacame a cowgirl, training horses for a living. YES. At ONE year old. I know. AMAZING.
THEN, as a '1-2' yr. old, she got a job at the local convenience store. Sadly, the owner didn't know how to manage a business.. But luckily, this great one year old he hired DOES! Being the kind person we all know she is, she decided to teach him how. (I know. GENEROUS.)
Then she noticed in order to get around in their cars, people needed gas.. So she built a gas station next door and single-handedly installed those gas pumps.
AND THAT'S HOW GAS CAME TO AMERICA.

If THAT doesn't make lucy meet the criteria for my most interesting people, I don't know what does!
Plus, she has a wicked awesome wannabe 'stache-beard. ..And you thought only MEN grew facial hair!

Now, for the grand finale:
Lucy is also... You heard it...
The CURRENT PRESIDENT of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.
That's right. Obama is a cover-up for her. Isn't that kind of him to do for her??
I thought so, too.