Missing my little 'Cougars' and 'Cheetahs'...

Writhing in misery.. I'm no longer allowed to go to work until I get a signed note from my neurologist stating that, with my epilepsy, it's safe for me to be working with children. This is a bunch of crap! I LOVE work, I'm seriously in physical pain and feel like I'm gonna barf (Not purposefully..) because it makes me so sick to have to be away from my kids. I've been crying for hours, now. Did you know that it takes 6-8 months on average to get an apt with a given neurologist? Luckily, it looks like getting a not only takes a few weeks.. Which I started trying to get a few weeks ago. Hopefully soon.. Then, on TOP of that, they're sending me a bunch of paperwork to fill out and want me to release my medical records for them. I can't release my medical records, and they can't make me! Pretty sure that's against the ADA. Normally I wouldn't care, but I've been in the psych ward more times than I can count (literally) for my Eating Disorder, and I feel like once they see how many times I've been admitted to Psych wards, they'll think I'm unstable, and therefore not suitable to work with children. Doesn't matter that it was just because of an ED, it's still a psych ward. I can't release that information to them, and I don't have to.. What the heck is this crap? I mean, I'm grateful that I'm still getting paid while all this drama is going on, but I don't care. I'd rather go to work and not get paid than not go to work and get paid for it. I just want to go to work. I want my kids back.